How Can I Change?/Tools of the Trade (II)

From Gospel Translations

tools—Scripture, conscience, and prayer—the Holy Spirit uses to accomplish our sanctification. Yet there are at least six important means remaining. In order to respond to the Spirit’s sanctifying work, we must familiar- ize ourselves with these other essential tools of the trade.

Self-Denial and a Life of Discipleship

A few years ago Fritos introduced an extremely hot Jalapeno chip. I tried to conceal my pleasure that, since the kids couldn’t stand them, I wouldn’t have to share.

At the store my children would ask, “Hey, Dad, why are we getting that kind? We don’t like them!” I know, thought I. That is precisely the point.

Within months, Fritos discontinued that flavor...no doubt on orders from above.

The famous Chinese Christian leader Watchman Nee once wrote, “Let us remember that the one reason for all misunderstanding, all fretfulness, all discontent, is that we secretly love ourselves.”1I can only add that with some of us, it’s no secret. We may attempt to hide our selfish- ness, but it inevitably bubbles up to the surface. Far better to heed Jesus’ call and address this self-love directly.

Then he said to them all: “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” (Lk 9:23-24)

Each day in Christ’s school of discipleship holds fresh opportunity for self-denial. Why is this much-forgotten key to the Christian life so important? Because it overcomes selfishness, making it possible for us to love God and others.

One arena in which selfishness gets exposed pretty quickly is marriage. I have often said to my wife (only half facetiously), “Honey, it’s not that I don’t love you. My problem is that I just love myself more.” Fortunately, God provides us with a cus- tom-fitted cross for the removal of such attitudes.

Don’t be fooled by the psychobabble that teaches we must first learn to love ourselves in order to become whole. Nowhere in Scripture are we commanded to love ourselves. We love ourselves too much as it is. In fact, we give ourselves the benefit of the doubt in almost every possible instance. We blame conflicts on others while flat- tering ourselves for having noble intentions. If we only extended to others the same grace we grant ourselves...what a wonderful world it would be.

When Jesus said one of the requirements for eternal life was to “love your neighbor as yourself,” he was not suggesting that self-love was in any way deficient. Rather, he was saying “love your neighbor as you (already) love yourself”—and that’s a whole lot of loving. But it will not come naturally. It may be one of the most unnatural things you ever do. Loving others comes only as we practice self- denial along the pathway of discipleship.

Self-denial and love intersect at the point of serving. Jesus gave us the supreme example by going to the cross on our behalf. That was the ultimate act of selfless service. But all during his life he put the needs and welfare of oth- ers before his own. Whether washing his disciples’ feet or feeding hungry multitudes, our Lord led by example. In Philippians 2, Paul could point to Jesus’ serving, self-denying attitude as one all Christians should emulate.

Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant.... (Php 2:4-7)

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